Does Your Middle Schooler Struggle To Get To School?
Do you struggle to get your middle school child to wake up on time in order to get to school? Is it always a battle to get him to the bus stop in time, or do you find yourself having to find him a ride to school? Does your daughter spend too much time "primping" and then realizes that she is going to be late and then she is rushing here and there in a mad dash to get to school on time? Or, maybe your child feigns illness or has a laundry list of excuses he uses to avoid having to go to school at all. If you have similar situations occurring in your home most mornings, don't despair, I have some suggestions that may help you to reduce school day stress or perhaps eliminate it altogether.
The first step toward achieving a peaceful school morning is to get to the REAL reason that your child is struggling with getting to school. Some of these situations are more easily solved than others. I will begin with the most challenging situations first.
If your child is unable to get ready on time there may be a few roadblocks that need to be avoided to ensure that your child is able to get to school on time.
1. Technology Lover
If waking up on time is the issue, check to see if your child is awake during the night playing video games, texting friends, reading e-books (this is the best case scenario), or doing any other activity that may prevent sleep.
Studies have proven that the white light from cell phones and video games, and yes even backlit e-readers may prevent their brains from entering a rest phase. Determine a time, that is about an hour or two before bedtime, for your child to put their electronics to "bed". Middle school children should be getting about 8-10 hours of sleep each night. If they need to be awake at 6:30 a.m. in order to be on time to school, then their electronics need to be shut down at approximately 7:00 or 8:00 p.m.
2. Night Owl Syndrome
Children who love to stay up late watching T.V. or working on a hobby need to restructure their circadian rhythms. Our biological clocks become established based on our natural sleep - wake cycles. Some people can't fall asleep unless it is completely dark or it is the set time in which they always fall asleep. Children who are allowed to go to bed later on Friday and Saturday nights or during school breaks may find that this interrupts their ability to fall asleep at an earlier time during the school week. If this is the case, try to implement a bedtime that is reasonable for your child both during the school week and on weekends and vacations. Keeping their bedtime consistent may be just the thing they need to help them catch more zzzzz's during the school week and wake up on time!
3. Procrastinator Problems
Some teens seem to take forever to get ready in the morning. They may spend an exorbitant amount of time in the shower, they can't seem to decide what they should wear, or perhaps they become distracted by TV or music. In this case making decisions about what to wear, getting their backpack organized and ready and deciding what they will have for breakfast (and maybe setting this up) should all take place the night before. Discussing reasonable time limits for showering should be set prior to shower time and sometimes maybe a timer should be use to signal when their shower time ends. Following these guidelines can help to alleviate those very unpleasant mornings that seem to pop up when teens are struggling to be on time.
4. I Hate School and I DON'T Want To GO!
If your child has not previously expressed dislike for school and is suddenly refusing to go to school there may be an underlying reason for their sudden refusal. If you and your child can discuss things easily (and keep in mind, teens tend to bottle up their feelings; this is natural) maybe you can encourage your child to share the real reason why he suddenly "Hates" school. There can be a whole host of reasons as to why he is feeling anxious about going to school. These issues can range from something as simple as not liking the new seating arrangement in science class to more serious issues like bullying a perceived danger. If your child won't share his real reason for disliking school, the next step that you should take is to schedule a conference with his teachers or the school principal to see if perhaps they can help shed some light on what has been taking place in your child's academic life. Teachers are usually very tuned in to each child in their class and may be able to give you information regarding situations they have noticed. Working together you and your child's teachers can usually discover the situations that are preventing your child from enjoying his school life.
Whatever the reason, it is so important for you and your child to work together to ensure that she receives the best education possible and that her attendance at school is regular and timely. Some children enjoy school more, and tend to work harder to do well when they are involved in an activity they love. For example joining the afterschool art club, the football, basketball, soccer team, or playing a musical instrument will give your child the nudge she needs to get to school and do her best each day!
3. Procrastinator Problems
Some teens seem to take forever to get ready in the morning. They may spend an exorbitant amount of time in the shower, they can't seem to decide what they should wear, or perhaps they become distracted by TV or music. In this case making decisions about what to wear, getting their backpack organized and ready and deciding what they will have for breakfast (and maybe setting this up) should all take place the night before. Discussing reasonable time limits for showering should be set prior to shower time and sometimes maybe a timer should be use to signal when their shower time ends. Following these guidelines can help to alleviate those very unpleasant mornings that seem to pop up when teens are struggling to be on time.
4. I Hate School and I DON'T Want To GO!
If your child has not previously expressed dislike for school and is suddenly refusing to go to school there may be an underlying reason for their sudden refusal. If you and your child can discuss things easily (and keep in mind, teens tend to bottle up their feelings; this is natural) maybe you can encourage your child to share the real reason why he suddenly "Hates" school. There can be a whole host of reasons as to why he is feeling anxious about going to school. These issues can range from something as simple as not liking the new seating arrangement in science class to more serious issues like bullying a perceived danger. If your child won't share his real reason for disliking school, the next step that you should take is to schedule a conference with his teachers or the school principal to see if perhaps they can help shed some light on what has been taking place in your child's academic life. Teachers are usually very tuned in to each child in their class and may be able to give you information regarding situations they have noticed. Working together you and your child's teachers can usually discover the situations that are preventing your child from enjoying his school life.
Whatever the reason, it is so important for you and your child to work together to ensure that she receives the best education possible and that her attendance at school is regular and timely. Some children enjoy school more, and tend to work harder to do well when they are involved in an activity they love. For example joining the afterschool art club, the football, basketball, soccer team, or playing a musical instrument will give your child the nudge she needs to get to school and do her best each day!
